Gimmicks, Threats, and Secret Weapons.
Jan 20, 2021 13:28:06 GMT -6
Deana Barrows and Dylan Thomas like this
Post by zybala on Jan 20, 2021 13:28:06 GMT -6
: We open up today's adventure at the Key West Theatre. Last time, we saw Life Before Death trying to find member Lucas Thames a gimmick or at least a little flare. We rejoin the group to see a tired looking Mike Zybala and Peter Vaughn sitting on a sofa in the Theatre's backstage area outside of the dressing room. Josie is nowhere to be seen. She either has gone to get food or got bored and left. Zybala shouts next and we go into a montage!! :
youtu.be/ss_BmTGv43M
: As the music plays, we see different shots of Lucas Thames coming out in a variety of costumes. Frankenstein, Avatar, Darth Vader, plus a mishmash of random clothes mixed together. Thames looks annoyed and Zybala looks increasingly frustrated at each failed attempt. After what feels like hours, Lucas walks out in his regular clothes. The montage is over. :
Thames: This isn't working, Mike. We've been here for what feels like days. Days we could have been using to train. Face it, I'm not the gimmicky type. I like letting my skills tell the story.
Zybala: Which is all well and good if you don't mind being stuck in the midcard, but don't you want more? Don't you want to get world title shots?
Thames: I do. I just don't think I need a gimmick to earn one when I got the skills to get it.
Zybala: I'm not doubting your skills. No one here is doubting your skills. But that only goes so far. The X-Division and TV titles are what the company awards skills for. The higher belts need skill too, but you also need marketability. You can be the biggest badass on the planet, but The Barrows won't give you a world title shot if you can't sell T-shirts or tickets. I mean, the big, brawny bruiser didn't need gimmicks in the 70's, but Hulk Hogan changed everything in the 80's….
Vaughn: Even I have a gimmick. Sure, I was a janitor, but you guys made me "The WRESTLING Janitor." I'm sure we can think of something...
: Thames sits in a chair opposite of the sofa and the trio sits in silence. Zybala leans back and gently thumps his head against the wall. Vaughn drums his fingers on the sofa arm. Thames looks like he wishes he was anywhere but here. Many minutes pass before Zybala sighs loudly. He is looking up at the ceiling, head against the wall. :
Zybala: I think we're going about this all wrong.
Vaughn: What do you mean?
Zybala: Well, we're trying to shove a whole gimmick on Luke in order to fight an already established gimmick group. S.E.X. has had time to grow naturally over time. Maybe we should take a step back, and approach this with baby steps. Let's see if we can find something for Luke organically. We're trying to figure out how to counter S.E.X. like some uptight church group. Instead we should focus on ourselves. Let them be space aliens. We can just focus on keeping our winning streak alive like the Buffalo Bills. Let a gimmick fall into Luke's lap naturally.
Thames: Thank you! Let's just kick some wrestling ass like we have been! Let the Green Lantern corps worry about aliens. We can worry about earning a tag team title shot by beating the former champs. Well, one half of them anyways. Terry hasn't won anything.
: Zybala whips his head in the direction of Thames, who now looks nervous. Zybala has that frantic, excited look in his eyes again. This is enough to worry anyone. :
Zybala: What did you just say?
Thames: Us beating the former champs?
Zybala: Before that!
Thames: About the aliens and Green Lanterns?
: Zybala claps excitedly before pointing at Lucas. :
Zybala: YES!! THAT!! That is something we can work with! That's our baby step. We already wear green and white wrestling gear when we come out together. I can call my people and they can have custom Green Lantern style gear for all of us by Friday!! It'll be like we're The G.L. Corps against the space invaders that is S.E.X.! Luke! You're fucking brilliant!
: Zybala starts fumbling with his pockets, looking for his phone. Thames looks over at Vaughn. :
Thames: Is he always like this when he gets excited?
Vaughn: You have no idea…
Thames: Can we calm him down or stop him?
Vaughn: Nope. How do you think I ended up on Exile Island so much? At this point, it's better to go with the flow.
Thames: Should I be worried?
Vaughn: Not sure. It's usually fifty-fifty with him. It could be a good or a bad idea. The only thing that's certain is that it's most definitely going to be weird. You've seen the Exile Island footage.
Thames: I did. Shit, I thought I was tough on you. At least I never made you fight wild animals.
Zybala: AH HA!
: Zybala startles his compatriots with his exclamation. He pulls out his cellphone and is about to use it when it suddenly rings. It's his turn to be startled as he sees the name on the screen and answers it. :
Zybala: Doctor! You must be psychic, I was about to call you! Listen, I need you to…….. Uh-huh…… slow down……. Yeah…...WHAT?!?...... You guys did it?!....... That's amazing!!...... I'll be on the next flight in…… See you soon... Bye Doc!
: Zybala hangs up the phone and puts it in his pocket. He then looks at a concerned Vaughn and Thames. :
Zybala: Gentlemen, how would you like to see something amazing?
Vaughn: Are you going to drug and bring us anyways if we say no?
: Thames shoots Vaughn a "what the fuck" look as Zybala chuckles. :
Zybala: Oh Peter. You know me too well. So, are we doing this the easy way or the hard way?
: Peter stands up, accepting his fate. Both men look at Thames, who is wondering, not for the first time, what he's gotten himself into. Zybala smiles reassuringly at his tag partner. :
Zybala: Trust me, Luke. You're gonna love this. If Marshall and Space Lord want to play aliens, I got the best thing to defend against Nefarious aliens. Plus, you might get to blow something up..
: Thames looks to Vaughn, who just shrugs. Thames stands up with a sigh and the three men make their way out of the theatre as the scene fades to black. :
youtu.be/ss_BmTGv43M
: As the music plays, we see different shots of Lucas Thames coming out in a variety of costumes. Frankenstein, Avatar, Darth Vader, plus a mishmash of random clothes mixed together. Thames looks annoyed and Zybala looks increasingly frustrated at each failed attempt. After what feels like hours, Lucas walks out in his regular clothes. The montage is over. :
Thames: This isn't working, Mike. We've been here for what feels like days. Days we could have been using to train. Face it, I'm not the gimmicky type. I like letting my skills tell the story.
Zybala: Which is all well and good if you don't mind being stuck in the midcard, but don't you want more? Don't you want to get world title shots?
Thames: I do. I just don't think I need a gimmick to earn one when I got the skills to get it.
Zybala: I'm not doubting your skills. No one here is doubting your skills. But that only goes so far. The X-Division and TV titles are what the company awards skills for. The higher belts need skill too, but you also need marketability. You can be the biggest badass on the planet, but The Barrows won't give you a world title shot if you can't sell T-shirts or tickets. I mean, the big, brawny bruiser didn't need gimmicks in the 70's, but Hulk Hogan changed everything in the 80's….
Vaughn: Even I have a gimmick. Sure, I was a janitor, but you guys made me "The WRESTLING Janitor." I'm sure we can think of something...
: Thames sits in a chair opposite of the sofa and the trio sits in silence. Zybala leans back and gently thumps his head against the wall. Vaughn drums his fingers on the sofa arm. Thames looks like he wishes he was anywhere but here. Many minutes pass before Zybala sighs loudly. He is looking up at the ceiling, head against the wall. :
Zybala: I think we're going about this all wrong.
Vaughn: What do you mean?
Zybala: Well, we're trying to shove a whole gimmick on Luke in order to fight an already established gimmick group. S.E.X. has had time to grow naturally over time. Maybe we should take a step back, and approach this with baby steps. Let's see if we can find something for Luke organically. We're trying to figure out how to counter S.E.X. like some uptight church group. Instead we should focus on ourselves. Let them be space aliens. We can just focus on keeping our winning streak alive like the Buffalo Bills. Let a gimmick fall into Luke's lap naturally.
Thames: Thank you! Let's just kick some wrestling ass like we have been! Let the Green Lantern corps worry about aliens. We can worry about earning a tag team title shot by beating the former champs. Well, one half of them anyways. Terry hasn't won anything.
: Zybala whips his head in the direction of Thames, who now looks nervous. Zybala has that frantic, excited look in his eyes again. This is enough to worry anyone. :
Zybala: What did you just say?
Thames: Us beating the former champs?
Zybala: Before that!
Thames: About the aliens and Green Lanterns?
: Zybala claps excitedly before pointing at Lucas. :
Zybala: YES!! THAT!! That is something we can work with! That's our baby step. We already wear green and white wrestling gear when we come out together. I can call my people and they can have custom Green Lantern style gear for all of us by Friday!! It'll be like we're The G.L. Corps against the space invaders that is S.E.X.! Luke! You're fucking brilliant!
: Zybala starts fumbling with his pockets, looking for his phone. Thames looks over at Vaughn. :
Thames: Is he always like this when he gets excited?
Vaughn: You have no idea…
Thames: Can we calm him down or stop him?
Vaughn: Nope. How do you think I ended up on Exile Island so much? At this point, it's better to go with the flow.
Thames: Should I be worried?
Vaughn: Not sure. It's usually fifty-fifty with him. It could be a good or a bad idea. The only thing that's certain is that it's most definitely going to be weird. You've seen the Exile Island footage.
Thames: I did. Shit, I thought I was tough on you. At least I never made you fight wild animals.
Zybala: AH HA!
: Zybala startles his compatriots with his exclamation. He pulls out his cellphone and is about to use it when it suddenly rings. It's his turn to be startled as he sees the name on the screen and answers it. :
Zybala: Doctor! You must be psychic, I was about to call you! Listen, I need you to…….. Uh-huh…… slow down……. Yeah…...WHAT?!?...... You guys did it?!....... That's amazing!!...... I'll be on the next flight in…… See you soon... Bye Doc!
: Zybala hangs up the phone and puts it in his pocket. He then looks at a concerned Vaughn and Thames. :
Zybala: Gentlemen, how would you like to see something amazing?
Vaughn: Are you going to drug and bring us anyways if we say no?
: Thames shoots Vaughn a "what the fuck" look as Zybala chuckles. :
Zybala: Oh Peter. You know me too well. So, are we doing this the easy way or the hard way?
: Peter stands up, accepting his fate. Both men look at Thames, who is wondering, not for the first time, what he's gotten himself into. Zybala smiles reassuringly at his tag partner. :
Zybala: Trust me, Luke. You're gonna love this. If Marshall and Space Lord want to play aliens, I got the best thing to defend against Nefarious aliens. Plus, you might get to blow something up..
: Thames looks to Vaughn, who just shrugs. Thames stands up with a sigh and the three men make their way out of the theatre as the scene fades to black. :
Damn right, S.E.X. is great! S.E.X. is fantastic! You would have to be a giant prude to see how wonderful S.E.X. is! Now that the mandatory 7th grade puns are out of the way, we can focus up. S.E.X. is amazing and everyone should watch them perform! Sorry, I had one more in me. S.E.X. is just so easy to bring up.
Really though, Sports Entertainment Xpress is pretty damn impressive. Ever since they joined GCWA, they have been making impact after impact. Whether it's the feuds with Sins of the Father or The A-List, or becoming the Nefarious Wrestling Outsiders or winning the tag team titles. They have been a force to be reckoned with! Why would anyone call them out and actively look for a fight with such stupendous former champs?
Although, Terry Marshall wasn't part of that championship winning combo, was he? It was Space Lord and The Cosmic Cowboy who won gold. That would leave Terry the odd man out of that glorious moment. So technically, Luke and I would only be facing half of the former tag team champions, and someone who's Thunder doesn't clap as loud as his other teammates. Sure, he had a good showing in the Righteous Rumble, but was it final four good? No,it wasn't.
Granted, that means Terry is the only one in this match who hasn't suffered a title loss in GCWA. Space Lord lost the tag belts, Luke lost the t.v. strap, and I've lost the X-Division AND tag belts. Who does that make wanting this win more though? The people who've had the taste of championship gold, or the man who has only seen gold on others? Us. We want this more. We want to prove that us losing our previous titles were mere slip ups. We are on the road to glory once again, and S.E.X. will barely be a pit stop.
Obviously, this match has championship implications to it. On one side you have part of the former champs and a man who has remained relevant in GCWA. On the other side, you have an undefeated team composed of former champions and a current Outsiders World champion. We want to add more gold to our resumé. I never got a tag title rematch after I was screwed out of the gauntlet match, and I know Luke wants to get back in the title scene.
Now does it make sense to you Terry? Can you and Space Lord see why Lucas and I called you out? Because you guys are two of the best that the tag team division has to offer. Who would be a better test for our skills than S.E.X.? Well, Sins of the Father would be since they beat you, but you guys are a very close second. We know that The Barrows wouldn't give us a match with Sins because we've just started as a team and only have a few wins. We need to make more noise and move up the ranks before we are deemed worthy of a title match. S.E.X. seems like a great stepping stone to do just that. Because you know what's better than S.E.X.
Zybala, Thames and Vaughn are! We have been unstoppable lately. Any combination of us is more than a match for you guys. The Fates have granted our team with the unbeatable melding of power, speed, agility and talent! We have fallen Thunder and Lightning. What good is a Thundering individual against us when the very element itself couldn't defend against us?! Life Before Death has defeated the very Gods themselves! What chance do a pair of alien space travelers have against a team that casually defeats Deities?!?
Our fates have been written in the stars! You might have passed them while in your spaceship. Destiny has smiled upon Life Before Death for it realizes that we have the true warrior spirit! It knows that our will and power is indomitable and no team under or above the stars can compare to the technical prowess and shear strength of Lucas Thames and the spectacular speed and skill of Mike Zybala! We have withstood thunderclap and lightning strikes! We chased the gods back to their heavenly thrones! Defeat is the only option that fate has in store for you two!!
Rambling like a concussed Space Lord aside, it doesn't matter which members of S.E.X. we face. Terry and Bug Girl. Space Lord and Cosmic Cowboy. Privates Pizza and Major Helmet, or the whole damn alien invasion! Life Before Death can handle and defeat any force thrown at us, be in Terrestrial or from beyond the stars. While there are no life or death stakes on the line in our match, we will be fighting like death awaits the loser. We will defeat your crew, we will demolish Terry and Space Lord in the ring, and if you try to use your spaceship or any other alien tech, we have an answer for that too. Let's just say we have a secret weapon to fend off space weapons…
Does that worry you? It should. Until this moment, S.E.X. has never faced a greater threat. The Klingon Armada, the devastating Quantum Virus, The Nightmare Child of Skaros, even the Thunderdome. All are minor hiccups compared to the unstoppable force of Life Before Death!!! We will not hold back or show mercy, because that would be an insult against one's opponent. We will bring everything we have against you and we will prevail. Plus, you made it personal. You two have besmirched my beloved Buffalo Bills! For that alone, I will destroy you! Winning is not an option for you guys. In fact, S.E.X. only has one of two options. Either they Tap or Snap!!