"The Greatest Person to Ever Live?" Part 1
Jan 23, 2021 22:32:35 GMT -6
Deana Barrows, Shawn Warstein, and 1 more like this
Post by Alessandro Quagliaterre on Jan 23, 2021 22:32:35 GMT -6
“If you want to be the greatest, you’ve got to want to be the best. You’ve got to get out there and earn it. You’ve got to be working while everyone else is sleeping!” - AQ, literally just now.
It had been a hectic 48 hours for Alessandro Quagliaterre. He had gone from Dallas to LA, then LA to Wyoming, wrestling seven matches in the process.
He didn't do it for the money, but for the love of professional wrestling.
One would think, putting Alessandro's body through that much exertion in such a short space of time would have made him absolutely spent. But it didn't.
If anything, it kept him buzzing, like an Adrenaline Rush. He now had plenty of recovery time, to focus all his attention, wrestling wise, on what would go down in Denver next weekend.
Having just got off a flight from Wyoming to Miami, Alessandro was on the move yet again. This time in a chauffeur-driven 2020 Cadillac Escalade Platinum. He sat in the back, in one of the reclining opulent leather VIP seats, equipped with a portable table. There was also a 4K ultra-HD TV with wrestling footage on it, of Enforcers GCWA matches.
“He’s got a well-rounded game for a grizzled veteran.”
Alessandro had a notepad sat open in front of him on the table, and made small notes to himself... but mostly he just watched. In truth, he wasn't much of a notetaker thanks to his great photographic memory.
“I’m not stupid going into Adrenaline Rush IV. He’s a legitimate threat, and he could be the first person to beat me, it’s not completely impossible. Only problem is, I’m not letting that happen.”
Alessandro made several scribbles with jumbled words on the paper. To anyone else reading, it looked like the Da Vinci Code.
“Is Enforcer beatable? He is… everybody is beatable.
Is it going to be hard as hell, and the hardest match of my career? Nope.
Do I have to do everything right from the beginning to the end of the match? Absolutely.
Is it going to be easy? Nu-uh. That isn’t what I’m saying.”
The gibberish he had written on the page was done deliberately. It was so that only he could decipher, when looking over it. For he was a visual learner.
“I’m saying that I’m going into Adrenaline Rush to win... and that there is nothing... Enforcer can do, to stop me.”
Alessandro nodded, with great belief.
“Why?”
He scoffed, answering the question.
“Unlike Enforcer, I don’t claim to be the greatest person to ever live or the greatest world television champion of all time. Which by the way, are both ridiculous nicknames and monikers, and have zero validity behind them. I simply go out to the ring on any given night when called upon and I don’t wait for greatness. I make my own.”
A few hours later, he was at Mariano Fernandez Birthday BBQ in a very plush property.
If you don’t know who that is, you’re an idiot.
It was a lovely day, as the sun always shines in Florida. It may have been winter elsewhere, but the heat was on in Miami.
There was a clown that was making balloon animals by the pool. Alessandro approached the clown, and asked for an Anthony Cross balloon. The clown tried to explain that he did not make people balloons, but Alessandro was having none of it. Eventually, a queue of children were waiting for balloons behind him. He got scolded by his partner’s sister in the background, to let the clown do his job. Alessandro was forced to cave, and got given a giraffe balloon.
“This looks nothing like Enforcer, but I’ll run with what I got.”
He had his game-face on and pretended as if the giraffe was Enforcer.
“He’s meant to eat a bag of soil each day, so he’s big and strong. He eats wood brick and nails, washing it down with some cement. That’s why he’s Enforcer! Looking at this, over-inflated balloon animal… he isn’t as tough as he looks.”
Alessandro squeezed the giraffe balloon a little too tight, and it unfortunately popped.
“Uh oh! Somebody call 911... we got a balloon down! This is not a drill people, I repeat we have a balloon down.”
The remaining air in the balloon caused it to flutter into the pool, and while the pool had been deep cleaned, surely someone must have peed into it because everyone pees in the pool.
“Great! Now Enforcer is covered in piss. I choked him out with my bare hands that he literally burst, and he was so embarrassed that he drowned himself.”
Alessandro facepalmed. He couldn’t believe the series of unfortunate events. RIP Giraffe Balloon!
“That was some good TV Anthony. Maybe even... Great TV!
“Something you should know all about? After all, you’re the Greatest Television Champion to have ever existed!”
“Here’s some revisionist history for you... So listen up, and listen hard.”
Somewhere, someplace, a man named Mikey Svarro just received a royalty check for the use of that phrase.
“If you’re the Greatest TV Champ of all time... surely you should know the whole heritage and prestige of the championship which you hold. So that it can be proved... without a shadow of a doubt... that it’s not just hot air when you say you’re the greatest... you have evidence to back it up!”
“Fact check… for everyone watching at home. In GCWA, Enforcer is a Three-Time TV Champion, and a One-Time Tag Team Champion. But do you know, out of the four times he’s had to defend a championship, how many times he has successfully defended a belt?”
He held up a finger.
“Only Once! Against Lucas Thames of the A-List... at Octobers Fright or Flight PPV.”
“When you look at the annals of the Television Championship history and you have legends of yesteryear like Crazy Chris, who successfully defended the TV Title 7 times... or Dangerous Dan and Robert Santana, who both defended the TV Title 6 times!”
“Yet you... Enforcer, the greatest person to ever live, has only defended it one time in comparison?”
“That’s atrocious.”
Alessandro was venomously disgusted.
“There’s a saying, Anthony, that a belt makes a wrestler...but you’d be a fool to believe that. A wrestler makes the belt, but that’s not a concept you grasp.”
“It's why I've said time and time again, I don't give a shit about winning championships. You think having a championship, makes you special? It doesn't!”
He shook his head with conviction.
“Never needed a title belt, and never will.”
“But come watch me… next Sunday take everything that matters to you, including leaving with your TV Championship.”
“Simply because I can.”
He can and he will.
“When I leave Adrenaline Rush with the TV Championship, I'm tossing it into the first trash can I see, and I'll still be more relevant than you. Because that’s how much you’ve devalued that championship with your never-ending game of hot potato.”
Alessandro was not a fan of hot potatoes, he doesn’t do complex carbs.
“For I am Alessandro Quagliaterre, and my name carries more weight than you... and my name is bigger and has more value than your championship ever will.”
That’s for real.
It had been a hectic 48 hours for Alessandro Quagliaterre. He had gone from Dallas to LA, then LA to Wyoming, wrestling seven matches in the process.
He didn't do it for the money, but for the love of professional wrestling.
One would think, putting Alessandro's body through that much exertion in such a short space of time would have made him absolutely spent. But it didn't.
If anything, it kept him buzzing, like an Adrenaline Rush. He now had plenty of recovery time, to focus all his attention, wrestling wise, on what would go down in Denver next weekend.
Having just got off a flight from Wyoming to Miami, Alessandro was on the move yet again. This time in a chauffeur-driven 2020 Cadillac Escalade Platinum. He sat in the back, in one of the reclining opulent leather VIP seats, equipped with a portable table. There was also a 4K ultra-HD TV with wrestling footage on it, of Enforcers GCWA matches.
“He’s got a well-rounded game for a grizzled veteran.”
Alessandro had a notepad sat open in front of him on the table, and made small notes to himself... but mostly he just watched. In truth, he wasn't much of a notetaker thanks to his great photographic memory.
“I’m not stupid going into Adrenaline Rush IV. He’s a legitimate threat, and he could be the first person to beat me, it’s not completely impossible. Only problem is, I’m not letting that happen.”
Alessandro made several scribbles with jumbled words on the paper. To anyone else reading, it looked like the Da Vinci Code.
“Is Enforcer beatable? He is… everybody is beatable.
Is it going to be hard as hell, and the hardest match of my career? Nope.
Do I have to do everything right from the beginning to the end of the match? Absolutely.
Is it going to be easy? Nu-uh. That isn’t what I’m saying.”
The gibberish he had written on the page was done deliberately. It was so that only he could decipher, when looking over it. For he was a visual learner.
“I’m saying that I’m going into Adrenaline Rush to win... and that there is nothing... Enforcer can do, to stop me.”
Alessandro nodded, with great belief.
“Why?”
He scoffed, answering the question.
“Unlike Enforcer, I don’t claim to be the greatest person to ever live or the greatest world television champion of all time. Which by the way, are both ridiculous nicknames and monikers, and have zero validity behind them. I simply go out to the ring on any given night when called upon and I don’t wait for greatness. I make my own.”
A few hours later, he was at Mariano Fernandez Birthday BBQ in a very plush property.
If you don’t know who that is, you’re an idiot.
It was a lovely day, as the sun always shines in Florida. It may have been winter elsewhere, but the heat was on in Miami.
There was a clown that was making balloon animals by the pool. Alessandro approached the clown, and asked for an Anthony Cross balloon. The clown tried to explain that he did not make people balloons, but Alessandro was having none of it. Eventually, a queue of children were waiting for balloons behind him. He got scolded by his partner’s sister in the background, to let the clown do his job. Alessandro was forced to cave, and got given a giraffe balloon.
“This looks nothing like Enforcer, but I’ll run with what I got.”
He had his game-face on and pretended as if the giraffe was Enforcer.
“He’s meant to eat a bag of soil each day, so he’s big and strong. He eats wood brick and nails, washing it down with some cement. That’s why he’s Enforcer! Looking at this, over-inflated balloon animal… he isn’t as tough as he looks.”
Alessandro squeezed the giraffe balloon a little too tight, and it unfortunately popped.
“Uh oh! Somebody call 911... we got a balloon down! This is not a drill people, I repeat we have a balloon down.”
The remaining air in the balloon caused it to flutter into the pool, and while the pool had been deep cleaned, surely someone must have peed into it because everyone pees in the pool.
“Great! Now Enforcer is covered in piss. I choked him out with my bare hands that he literally burst, and he was so embarrassed that he drowned himself.”
Alessandro facepalmed. He couldn’t believe the series of unfortunate events. RIP Giraffe Balloon!
“That was some good TV Anthony. Maybe even... Great TV!
“Something you should know all about? After all, you’re the Greatest Television Champion to have ever existed!”
“Here’s some revisionist history for you... So listen up, and listen hard.”
Somewhere, someplace, a man named Mikey Svarro just received a royalty check for the use of that phrase.
“If you’re the Greatest TV Champ of all time... surely you should know the whole heritage and prestige of the championship which you hold. So that it can be proved... without a shadow of a doubt... that it’s not just hot air when you say you’re the greatest... you have evidence to back it up!”
“Fact check… for everyone watching at home. In GCWA, Enforcer is a Three-Time TV Champion, and a One-Time Tag Team Champion. But do you know, out of the four times he’s had to defend a championship, how many times he has successfully defended a belt?”
He held up a finger.
“Only Once! Against Lucas Thames of the A-List... at Octobers Fright or Flight PPV.”
“When you look at the annals of the Television Championship history and you have legends of yesteryear like Crazy Chris, who successfully defended the TV Title 7 times... or Dangerous Dan and Robert Santana, who both defended the TV Title 6 times!”
“Yet you... Enforcer, the greatest person to ever live, has only defended it one time in comparison?”
“That’s atrocious.”
Alessandro was venomously disgusted.
“There’s a saying, Anthony, that a belt makes a wrestler...but you’d be a fool to believe that. A wrestler makes the belt, but that’s not a concept you grasp.”
“It's why I've said time and time again, I don't give a shit about winning championships. You think having a championship, makes you special? It doesn't!”
He shook his head with conviction.
“Never needed a title belt, and never will.”
“But come watch me… next Sunday take everything that matters to you, including leaving with your TV Championship.”
“Simply because I can.”
He can and he will.
“When I leave Adrenaline Rush with the TV Championship, I'm tossing it into the first trash can I see, and I'll still be more relevant than you. Because that’s how much you’ve devalued that championship with your never-ending game of hot potato.”
Alessandro was not a fan of hot potatoes, he doesn’t do complex carbs.
“For I am Alessandro Quagliaterre, and my name carries more weight than you... and my name is bigger and has more value than your championship ever will.”
That’s for real.
