Post by SportsEntertainmentXpress on Mar 11, 2021 12:27:27 GMT -6
Stardate 20211203
OH YEAH, RIGHT THERE!
YES, HARDER!
OH MY, NO ONE HAS EVER TOUCHED ME LIKE YOU!
Private Pizza and Sargent Spot are standing outside of Bug Girls bedroom on the Starship Desolater with their ears stuck to the door and their eyes as wide as saucers as they listen to the loud noises coming from her room.
OH HELMET, YOUR HANDS ARE MAGIC!
Pizza and Spot giggle as their imaginations run wild. Space Lord though is not amused as he rounds the corner and sees his crew members lurking in another crew member's quarters.
WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!?!
Pizza and Spot jump in fear and spin around to face their captain. Both men snap to attention, but also shiver in fear like a cartoon.
Wellllllllll???
It's uh, it's, ummm...
Spit it out already.
It's Bug Girl and Major Helmet.
We think Bug Girl is going to be planting her eggs into Helmet.
WHAT!?! NOT ON MY WATCH!
Space Lords whips a swipe card from his trunks because he never wears pants just trunks. And, don't ask me where he was carrying that card, you really don't want to know.
Space Lord swipes the card against the card swipe gimmick, I don't know what those things are called, censors, maybe? What he sees when the door opens makes him wish someone had said "swiper no swiping".
He sees Bug Girl face down with her face right in a hole... the hole of a massage table. And Major Helmet was massaging her back with skull and technique that'd make you swear he was Swedish. The room reeked of Lavender, soft jazz was playing, and it was so peaceful. The peace and tranquility upset Space Lord almost as much as the sight of seeing Major Helmet shirtless did.
What is going on here, this is not how you prepare for a championship battle.
Bug Girl sits up wrapping a towel around her bare torso as Major Helmet stands at attention.
Captain, we just finished clanging and banging and Bug Girl got a knot in her back from heavy Penlay rows.
Hmmm... did you rack your weights when you finished?
Sir, yes sir.
Good, always rack your weights, if you don't then you are a filthy animal.
"I wouldn't mind doing some filthy animal stuff" Bug Girl mumbles to herself, but it was loud enough that Space Lord heard it.
WHAT WAS THAT!?!
Space Lord moves closer to Bug Girl and sticks his finger in her face.
I will not have you implanting your eggs into Helmet. I just got him back after thinking he was dead and now you want your spawn to hatch in his stomach, and feast on his organs until they are big enough to burst through his soft, non-abdominal muscles containing belly?
Unexpectedly to everyone, even himself, Major Helmet steps between Space Lord and Bug Girl.
Captain, I love this woman. If she chose me to reproduce with I would gladly let our spawn feast on my insides and give my life for their birth. Honestly, the only thing I could imagine loving more than she would be our children.
Helmet realizes what he has just said and grows quiet. The entire room grows quiet and Space Lord's jaw drops open in shock like a slack-jawed yokel. Bug Girl slowly stands from the table and places her hand on Helmet's shoulder. At her touch Helmet turns to look deep into her eyes.
Helmet, that is the sweetest thing anyone has ever said about me. But, I would never want to plant my eggs inside of you.
Sadness creeps across Helmet's face as his head drops.
Because you would make such a great father, I would want you around to raise our spawn.
Helmet's head raises, gone is the sadness and in its place is the biggest smile ever. Without a word, Helmet wraps his arms around Bug Girl and pulls her into him for a big kiss.
EWW!
Monologue:
This is it, my chance to show Earth that I'm not just some little wimp who has to hide behind his captain or love.
I think you've already done that dear.
Really? How?
You fought and won War Games against the A-List. You led a rebellion against the NWO. You were champion of the Thunderdome. And, we've been kicking butt in OCW so far.
You're right, I have done all that, maybe the only person that I need to prove myself to, is me.
I think you are the only person who doesn’t believe in you.
Well, enough is enough and it’s time for a change. At Double X, I’m going to get double X, eXtreme and eXciting. I’m going to climb that ladder like it is the ladder to success and grab those Outsider’s tag team championship. One for me, and one for my girlfriend.
THAT’S RIGHT!
I said, girlfriend. I have a girlfriend now, and this has given me the boost I need to conquer not only the Outsider’s tag team division but the world. The Family has already fallen to my might adamantium helmet. Wrath of the Storm has felt my wrath, and now it is time for the Malvados to say adios to those tag team titles. I know our six opponents in this match don’t believe that I am a threat, but every time I have been challenged, I have stepped up and not only faced the challenge but conquered it. This will be no different, I’ve climbed the tallest mountains, so climbing a ladder will be a piece of cake.
For far too long Helmet and I have been looked at as some sideshow freaks. Helmet looked at as comic relief, while I have been looked at as a freak with antenna. Well, the jokes on all of you. We battled our way into this match and earned our spot, and at double X the turntables will turn. We will have the last laugh, and those that laugh last, laugh best.
OH YEAH, RIGHT THERE!
YES, HARDER!
OH MY, NO ONE HAS EVER TOUCHED ME LIKE YOU!
Private Pizza and Sargent Spot are standing outside of Bug Girls bedroom on the Starship Desolater with their ears stuck to the door and their eyes as wide as saucers as they listen to the loud noises coming from her room.
OH HELMET, YOUR HANDS ARE MAGIC!
Pizza and Spot giggle as their imaginations run wild. Space Lord though is not amused as he rounds the corner and sees his crew members lurking in another crew member's quarters.
WHAT IS GOING ON HERE!?!
Pizza and Spot jump in fear and spin around to face their captain. Both men snap to attention, but also shiver in fear like a cartoon.
Wellllllllll???
It's uh, it's, ummm...
Spit it out already.
It's Bug Girl and Major Helmet.
We think Bug Girl is going to be planting her eggs into Helmet.
WHAT!?! NOT ON MY WATCH!
Space Lords whips a swipe card from his trunks because he never wears pants just trunks. And, don't ask me where he was carrying that card, you really don't want to know.
Space Lord swipes the card against the card swipe gimmick, I don't know what those things are called, censors, maybe? What he sees when the door opens makes him wish someone had said "swiper no swiping".
He sees Bug Girl face down with her face right in a hole... the hole of a massage table. And Major Helmet was massaging her back with skull and technique that'd make you swear he was Swedish. The room reeked of Lavender, soft jazz was playing, and it was so peaceful. The peace and tranquility upset Space Lord almost as much as the sight of seeing Major Helmet shirtless did.
What is going on here, this is not how you prepare for a championship battle.
Bug Girl sits up wrapping a towel around her bare torso as Major Helmet stands at attention.
Captain, we just finished clanging and banging and Bug Girl got a knot in her back from heavy Penlay rows.
Hmmm... did you rack your weights when you finished?
Sir, yes sir.
Good, always rack your weights, if you don't then you are a filthy animal.
"I wouldn't mind doing some filthy animal stuff" Bug Girl mumbles to herself, but it was loud enough that Space Lord heard it.
WHAT WAS THAT!?!
Space Lord moves closer to Bug Girl and sticks his finger in her face.
I will not have you implanting your eggs into Helmet. I just got him back after thinking he was dead and now you want your spawn to hatch in his stomach, and feast on his organs until they are big enough to burst through his soft, non-abdominal muscles containing belly?
Unexpectedly to everyone, even himself, Major Helmet steps between Space Lord and Bug Girl.
Captain, I love this woman. If she chose me to reproduce with I would gladly let our spawn feast on my insides and give my life for their birth. Honestly, the only thing I could imagine loving more than she would be our children.
Helmet realizes what he has just said and grows quiet. The entire room grows quiet and Space Lord's jaw drops open in shock like a slack-jawed yokel. Bug Girl slowly stands from the table and places her hand on Helmet's shoulder. At her touch Helmet turns to look deep into her eyes.
Helmet, that is the sweetest thing anyone has ever said about me. But, I would never want to plant my eggs inside of you.
Sadness creeps across Helmet's face as his head drops.
Because you would make such a great father, I would want you around to raise our spawn.
Helmet's head raises, gone is the sadness and in its place is the biggest smile ever. Without a word, Helmet wraps his arms around Bug Girl and pulls her into him for a big kiss.
EWW!
Monologue:
This is it, my chance to show Earth that I'm not just some little wimp who has to hide behind his captain or love.
I think you've already done that dear.
Really? How?
You fought and won War Games against the A-List. You led a rebellion against the NWO. You were champion of the Thunderdome. And, we've been kicking butt in OCW so far.
You're right, I have done all that, maybe the only person that I need to prove myself to, is me.
I think you are the only person who doesn’t believe in you.
Well, enough is enough and it’s time for a change. At Double X, I’m going to get double X, eXtreme and eXciting. I’m going to climb that ladder like it is the ladder to success and grab those Outsider’s tag team championship. One for me, and one for my girlfriend.
THAT’S RIGHT!
I said, girlfriend. I have a girlfriend now, and this has given me the boost I need to conquer not only the Outsider’s tag team division but the world. The Family has already fallen to my might adamantium helmet. Wrath of the Storm has felt my wrath, and now it is time for the Malvados to say adios to those tag team titles. I know our six opponents in this match don’t believe that I am a threat, but every time I have been challenged, I have stepped up and not only faced the challenge but conquered it. This will be no different, I’ve climbed the tallest mountains, so climbing a ladder will be a piece of cake.
For far too long Helmet and I have been looked at as some sideshow freaks. Helmet looked at as comic relief, while I have been looked at as a freak with antenna. Well, the jokes on all of you. We battled our way into this match and earned our spot, and at double X the turntables will turn. We will have the last laugh, and those that laugh last, laugh best.
