The Graham Norton show: USA and A-List special (Dave)
Dec 16, 2020 23:24:50 GMT -6
Deana Barrows, Jack Puffer, and 1 more like this
Post by The A-List Fixer on Dec 16, 2020 23:24:50 GMT -6
**I’m sat here in my car waiting for Dyl and Liss to show up. Lissandra has asked me to meet ‘em at some TV studio as we’re going on TV for an interview apparently. Great – just as long as this interviewer – whoever they are – doesn’t pry all that much into my life then we’ll be jus’ fine. Heh… the Righteous Rumble. A chance where Dave Branson can show the world just what he can do. Of course being there to watch Dylan’s back is officially what I’m there to do. We’re entering the match together as a unit of course. But who knows? Maybe just maybe...What if Dave Branson really did go on to win the thing? To become the number one contender to the GCWA title? I do owe James Raven a beating… Oh wait… here they finally are.**
Some time later…
**I’m sat in the TV studio’s green room waiting to go on. Apparently it’s that Irish guy from the UK Graham Norton interviewing us. Ehh. I caught some of his show when I was over in the UK a while back while on a job. He’s a little bit soft, I suppose but I’ll play nice.**
Dylan: Dude… I gotta talk to you.
**Uh oh…. What’s this? Dyl wants to talk to me?**
**“Yeah? What’s up?” I say, wondering just where this is going?**
Dylan: I just wanna make sure you’re gonna do the right thing. You know? Helping me win the Righteous Rumble?
**The right thing huh? Well Dyl, I’m thinking I might wanna go ahead of you. Maybe you can help me win for once huh? I look down at him, seeing that he’s unsure of what I’m about to say. I smile, putting his mind at rest and reassure him that everything’s gonna be fine. He looks relieved and I pat him on the back when in walks Lissandra telling us that Graham Norton’s ready for us. Fuckin’ show time!**
Some time later.
**Dylan and Lissandra do their bit before Dylan cuts a promo.**
Graham: Dave can we get one from you as well?
**I stand up to do my bit. I’ve been getting better at these now.**
Graham: Oh wait. I’m just being told that we’ve got to go to commercial break. We’ll be right back.
**Damn.**
=----=-----=-----=-----=----=
Graham: Welcome back everyone to part two of the Graham Norton Show USA with my guests for the evening, The A-List. Now Dave I’m sorry about that. I’m not used to commercial breaks. I worked for the BBC – they didn’t have commercial breaks hahahaha. Now...Dave… can we get a good look at you a moment? Stand up please…
Looking confused, Dave stands up while Dylan and Lissandra look on smiling.
Graham: Wow! Dave… how exactly tall are you?
Dave: 6’7.
Dylan: ….And 300lbs of pure baddassery!
Graham: I’ve no doubt about it.
Dylan and Dave smirk at one another as Dave sits down again.
Graham: He’s a big boy, isn’t he, folks?
The crowd cheer in agreement. Dylan smiles.
Dylan: You know Graham, even though I know that Dave is going to be out there to watch my back. I don’t expect him to just roll over and let me win you know. I want Dave to give me the fight that I know he can bring to the table. Everyone in that ring is going to be put on notice on Sunday Night. When the inevitable happens and it comes down to ‘Perfection Personified’ or the A-List Fixer… I would be hurt, distraught even, if Dave just allowed me to throw him over and win the thing.
**I look at Dylan as he’s saying all of this and I have to smile to myself. The funny thing is Dylan...that isn’t what you said to me backstage before we came out here so I KNOW this is just a sham for Graham Norton and the people watching. Well brother, as much as I do have your back… you won’t be winning this one so easily….**
Graham: Dave? You look like you’re smiling there?
Dave: What? Oh no… Don’t worry Dylan. If you want to win the thing man… you’ll definitely have to go through me. You know that I love you, man… we’re brothers but I know you’d be disappointed if you immediately threw me out of the ring to win the thing
Dave pats Dylan on the back reassuringly and Dylan smiles like the Cheshire Cat, nodding along with everything that Dave said. The two then shake hands and embrace in a manly hug as the studio audience cheer. Lissandra is beside herself with pride.
Lissandra: You see Graham? The A-List are a family. We’ve known Dave for the longest time and we know that he’ll be out there for Dylan when he needs him. After all, he’s been in our employ for a number of years now. And not once has he given us reason to question us. He’s been with us through thick and thin. We are proof Graham that you don’t necessarily have to share blood to be family. We know that when it comes down to it that our boy David Branson is going to be there when we need him because Dylan Thomas needs his championship shot again. When the Righteous Rumble is said and done Graham… you’re looking at the next Number One Contender to the GCWA strap and this time Graham… my husband, my darling man….my Prince of Perfection is going to walk away as the new GCWA Champion!
Graham: Well with a man like Dave watching his back, I can’t disagree. So Dave… how about a promo from you?
Dave: Sure. Which camera was it again?
Graham: It’s camera 2.
Dave: Sure not a problem.
Dave searches for camera 2 and locates it after a few seconds. He straightens his jacket, standing up, to appear more intimidating. It works on Graham Norton at least, who shies away from Dave. Both Lissandra and Dylan smile broadly.
Dave: Since joinin’ the GCWA, I’ve concentrated on two things: Keeping the Thomas’s safe and beating their enemies to a pulp. This Sunday it will be no different. I’m gonna walk out there side by side with Dylan and the two of us are going to throw the lot of you out until like Dylan said earlier on – it’s down to myself and him. Then when it is down to Dylan and myself… well may the best one win. Eh Dyl?
**I smirk and Dylan smirks back**
But quite frankly it matters little as to who comes out on top when it is down to Dylan and I because like Lissandra just said, the A-List are a family. The only thing that matters is that I’m the one breaking each and every one of you that are in that Rumble in half! Quite ironic really, coming from the A-List Fixer. In my eyes… Win, lose… I couldn’t care less. All that matters to me is that Dylan and Lissandra are safe and everyone else ends up with something broken… more than just their pride anyway. Because when the A-List are in there together as one… there isn’t a lot that’s going to damn well stop us. When I’m done...I’m going to make sure that everyone is going to get FIXED on Sunday Night!
The crowd cheer again and Graham Norton looks a little weary, but eventually shakes it off looking on impressed and Dave goes to sit back down next to Dylan and the two high five.
Graham: Well… I’ve got to admit, I don’t really know much about wrestling but if those promos are anything to go by then I have to say… The rest of your opponents on Sunday Night don’t stand a chance!
Lissandra smiles once again, joining in on the audience clapping.
Graham: OK…. OK Dave, I have to ask. You have an autobiography in the works. Isn’t that right?
Dave: That’s true yeah.
Graham: Sooooooo I’m guessing that it goes into detail of your life prior to the GCWA?
Dave: To some degree.
Graham: Well can we hear a little bit of who Dave Branson used to be?
Dave: Not really much to talk about Graham. I was what you see before you now. A baddass, intimidating son of a bitch.
Graham: But there has to be something juicy…
Dave: Does there? Why? Because you said so?
Dave stands up and marches over to Graham, grabbing the collar of his shirt, hoisting him to his feet.
Graham: WOAH!
Dave: Is this what you expected Graham? Is this what you wanted?! I told you there’s not much to talk about. Let it go!
Dave then immediately throws Graham Norton back down in his chair and sits back down on the sofa. He clears his throat a little as Graham straightens his jacket.
Graham: I’m sorry if things got a little too much there for you Dave. I’m only trying to do my job.
Lissandra: Dave doesn’t really go into that side of his past Graham. Even Dylan and I don’t really know much about it.
Dave: Yeah. Sorry Graham. Don’t talk about that… are you OK?
Graham: It was a good showing for Sunday Night I suppose! No harm done. Ladies and Gentlemen…...The A-List!
=----=----=----=
Word Count: 1,554
Some time later…
**I’m sat in the TV studio’s green room waiting to go on. Apparently it’s that Irish guy from the UK Graham Norton interviewing us. Ehh. I caught some of his show when I was over in the UK a while back while on a job. He’s a little bit soft, I suppose but I’ll play nice.**
Dylan: Dude… I gotta talk to you.
**Uh oh…. What’s this? Dyl wants to talk to me?**
**“Yeah? What’s up?” I say, wondering just where this is going?**
Dylan: I just wanna make sure you’re gonna do the right thing. You know? Helping me win the Righteous Rumble?
**The right thing huh? Well Dyl, I’m thinking I might wanna go ahead of you. Maybe you can help me win for once huh? I look down at him, seeing that he’s unsure of what I’m about to say. I smile, putting his mind at rest and reassure him that everything’s gonna be fine. He looks relieved and I pat him on the back when in walks Lissandra telling us that Graham Norton’s ready for us. Fuckin’ show time!**
Some time later.
**Dylan and Lissandra do their bit before Dylan cuts a promo.**
Graham: Dave can we get one from you as well?
**I stand up to do my bit. I’ve been getting better at these now.**
Graham: Oh wait. I’m just being told that we’ve got to go to commercial break. We’ll be right back.
**Damn.**
=----=-----=-----=-----=----=
Graham: Welcome back everyone to part two of the Graham Norton Show USA with my guests for the evening, The A-List. Now Dave I’m sorry about that. I’m not used to commercial breaks. I worked for the BBC – they didn’t have commercial breaks hahahaha. Now...Dave… can we get a good look at you a moment? Stand up please…
Looking confused, Dave stands up while Dylan and Lissandra look on smiling.
Graham: Wow! Dave… how exactly tall are you?
Dave: 6’7.
Dylan: ….And 300lbs of pure baddassery!
Graham: I’ve no doubt about it.
Dylan and Dave smirk at one another as Dave sits down again.
Graham: He’s a big boy, isn’t he, folks?
The crowd cheer in agreement. Dylan smiles.
Dylan: You know Graham, even though I know that Dave is going to be out there to watch my back. I don’t expect him to just roll over and let me win you know. I want Dave to give me the fight that I know he can bring to the table. Everyone in that ring is going to be put on notice on Sunday Night. When the inevitable happens and it comes down to ‘Perfection Personified’ or the A-List Fixer… I would be hurt, distraught even, if Dave just allowed me to throw him over and win the thing.
**I look at Dylan as he’s saying all of this and I have to smile to myself. The funny thing is Dylan...that isn’t what you said to me backstage before we came out here so I KNOW this is just a sham for Graham Norton and the people watching. Well brother, as much as I do have your back… you won’t be winning this one so easily….**
Graham: Dave? You look like you’re smiling there?
Dave: What? Oh no… Don’t worry Dylan. If you want to win the thing man… you’ll definitely have to go through me. You know that I love you, man… we’re brothers but I know you’d be disappointed if you immediately threw me out of the ring to win the thing
Dave pats Dylan on the back reassuringly and Dylan smiles like the Cheshire Cat, nodding along with everything that Dave said. The two then shake hands and embrace in a manly hug as the studio audience cheer. Lissandra is beside herself with pride.
Lissandra: You see Graham? The A-List are a family. We’ve known Dave for the longest time and we know that he’ll be out there for Dylan when he needs him. After all, he’s been in our employ for a number of years now. And not once has he given us reason to question us. He’s been with us through thick and thin. We are proof Graham that you don’t necessarily have to share blood to be family. We know that when it comes down to it that our boy David Branson is going to be there when we need him because Dylan Thomas needs his championship shot again. When the Righteous Rumble is said and done Graham… you’re looking at the next Number One Contender to the GCWA strap and this time Graham… my husband, my darling man….my Prince of Perfection is going to walk away as the new GCWA Champion!
Graham: Well with a man like Dave watching his back, I can’t disagree. So Dave… how about a promo from you?
Dave: Sure. Which camera was it again?
Graham: It’s camera 2.
Dave: Sure not a problem.
Dave searches for camera 2 and locates it after a few seconds. He straightens his jacket, standing up, to appear more intimidating. It works on Graham Norton at least, who shies away from Dave. Both Lissandra and Dylan smile broadly.
Dave: Since joinin’ the GCWA, I’ve concentrated on two things: Keeping the Thomas’s safe and beating their enemies to a pulp. This Sunday it will be no different. I’m gonna walk out there side by side with Dylan and the two of us are going to throw the lot of you out until like Dylan said earlier on – it’s down to myself and him. Then when it is down to Dylan and myself… well may the best one win. Eh Dyl?
**I smirk and Dylan smirks back**
But quite frankly it matters little as to who comes out on top when it is down to Dylan and I because like Lissandra just said, the A-List are a family. The only thing that matters is that I’m the one breaking each and every one of you that are in that Rumble in half! Quite ironic really, coming from the A-List Fixer. In my eyes… Win, lose… I couldn’t care less. All that matters to me is that Dylan and Lissandra are safe and everyone else ends up with something broken… more than just their pride anyway. Because when the A-List are in there together as one… there isn’t a lot that’s going to damn well stop us. When I’m done...I’m going to make sure that everyone is going to get FIXED on Sunday Night!
The crowd cheer again and Graham Norton looks a little weary, but eventually shakes it off looking on impressed and Dave goes to sit back down next to Dylan and the two high five.
Graham: Well… I’ve got to admit, I don’t really know much about wrestling but if those promos are anything to go by then I have to say… The rest of your opponents on Sunday Night don’t stand a chance!
Lissandra smiles once again, joining in on the audience clapping.
Graham: OK…. OK Dave, I have to ask. You have an autobiography in the works. Isn’t that right?
Dave: That’s true yeah.
Graham: Sooooooo I’m guessing that it goes into detail of your life prior to the GCWA?
Dave: To some degree.
Graham: Well can we hear a little bit of who Dave Branson used to be?
Dave: Not really much to talk about Graham. I was what you see before you now. A baddass, intimidating son of a bitch.
Graham: But there has to be something juicy…
Dave: Does there? Why? Because you said so?
Dave stands up and marches over to Graham, grabbing the collar of his shirt, hoisting him to his feet.
Graham: WOAH!
Dave: Is this what you expected Graham? Is this what you wanted?! I told you there’s not much to talk about. Let it go!
Dave then immediately throws Graham Norton back down in his chair and sits back down on the sofa. He clears his throat a little as Graham straightens his jacket.
Graham: I’m sorry if things got a little too much there for you Dave. I’m only trying to do my job.
Lissandra: Dave doesn’t really go into that side of his past Graham. Even Dylan and I don’t really know much about it.
Dave: Yeah. Sorry Graham. Don’t talk about that… are you OK?
Graham: It was a good showing for Sunday Night I suppose! No harm done. Ladies and Gentlemen…...The A-List!
=----=----=----=
Word Count: 1,554
