Sol & Pappy Goldblum Kosher Hotdog Wiener Emporium [CLOSED]

Sol Goldblum and his father (our records show he is only known as Pappy Goldblum) ran the 3rd biggest and successful Kosher Hotdog Wiener Emporium in all of Windsor, Ontario Canada. Cleverly named "Sol and Pappy Goldblum Kosher Hotdog Wiener Emporium Inc." 

Their two rival Kosher Emporiums were Hakeem's Kosher Dogs. And actor Richard Gere's invested company 'Gere Kosh: The Wiener Emporium'. 

While in third place in Windsor, Sol and Pappy made an expensive and high class living for their families. But the successful father and son hotdog owners were on the rocks as of 2018. When Sol wanted to switch the garlic in the kosher pepperoni to a cheaper garlic brand and... well uninteresting story short. Pappy disagreed and the two had a fallen out since. Pappy lives in Windsor running the Family business hands on. As Sol and his wife, Julie and their children moved to the city of New York, in the United States. Their children, Adi Goldblum, 30, was raised as if she was an only child, spoiled rotten by her parents. Very athletic and even trains in the MMA and combat sports for fun. Her brother, Fisher, 35, is how you say... um... Mentally Ill. The giant 6'8 footer stays in New York's finest and most expensive mental rehabilitation asylum money can offer. Everything was going well for the Goldblum's... until now... 

October 2019





We open on a shot in Pappy Goldblum's office. We know this because of the giant painted portrait of himself and his trusty dog, Mein Kampf , behind his desk. Seated infront of him is Adi Gold(blum, switched her name to fit in with the New Yorker society). She sits there swiping through her phone looking very impatient. She looks to the left of her where her bearded giant brother is sitting looking out the window. He is in a tuxedo 5 times too small for him. Pappy can be seen dozing off at his desk.



Adi: Grandpa. First of all, where is my father?



This wakens him.



Pappy: Huh? Oh yeah. My grandkids. Fisher... how are you doing?



Fisher smiles at his grandfather.



Pappy: That's good... Fish my boy. And my sweet Adi...



Adi: Pop-pop. Look. I have a big premiere of the Sam Neil 90s film The Bicentennial Man at the Clark that i NEED to be at in the next few hours. I cannot be late. I may need to take your Jet.



Pappy: I lost the Jet... and Wasn't Robin Williams in that?



Adi: Who? Wait... what? No Jet?



Fisher laughs.



Adi: Whatever. Where is my father and why is my bologna breath brother here? Shouldn't he be in some padded room in one of those... crazy jackets.



Fisher: Straight...



Adi: Whatever. I'm calling dad.



Adi goes to stand up but Pappy shouts "SIT DOWN!" She does.



Pappy: Children, I have good news and bad news... what do you want to hear first?



Fisher jumping in raising his hand.



Fisher: Oh! oh! Oh! ... BAD!



Adi rolls her eyes.



Pappy: Well... your father and I had to sell the Wiener Emporium company to China. Which means both of your meal tickets are coming to end. Sorry Adi. Sorry Fish.



Adi looks shocked at the reveal of this news. Fisher claps his hands.



Fisher: Good!?!



Adi: Yes, grandpa what the HELL could be the good news...?



Pappy puts his blood stained socked foot on the desk and rips off the sock.



Pappy: I figured out my toe wasn't infected... just ingrown...



Adi stands up trying not to blow up at her grandfather in anger and his disgusting feet.



Adi: So... what happens now? What happens to my apartment loft in New York? What happens to my celebrity friends? What is Jamie Foxx and Megan Fox and my pet fox going to say about this? Buy it back...



Pappy: Afraid I can't dear. But you have options...



Adi: Speak up. Hellllllooooooo!?!?! What options?



Pappy: Wrestling my dear. I sent a tape of you from your training to GCWA and they are pumped to have you both there... I sold them some Kosher Ham years back and they never forgot about the deal I gave them. Oi vey what a deal that was.



Adi: What is happening? Wait, Both? What? Wrestling? Like that stuff old carnies used to do at state fairs?



Pappy: Yes, that's exactly what it is. And Fisher will be joining you. You will work together. Along with your MMA training tape i sent them, i also sent them that home video of FIsher eating that Grizzly Bear cub alive in the dirty back woods. They at GCWA weren't as interested but i talked them into a great deal. Oi, vey. What a deal that was, children. What. A. Deal. I believe they're located in Texas, But maybe you will get to travel the world?



Adi: Wrestle? For a living? With Fisher?
This whole thing sounds made up. I don't believe it. Like something out of a bad script. Hopefully Jason Myers uses his chainsaw and kills all of you in the next act! Fisher especially... 


Fisher pointing to himself.



Fisher: Tha's me!



Adi: I think I'm going to be sick...



Pappy: Use the toilet in the back of my office. Mein Kampf likes to eat out of my trashcans. That dog will eat anything. Wrappers. Candy Wrappers. Tampon wrappers. Onion skin... wrappers? Basically trash wrappers... he a good dog.



Adi over dramatically faints into her chair as Fisher pets her head just as Pappy plays Joe Jackson's 'Steppin' Out' on his computer, low quality.



Pappy: The Goldblum's are indeed stepping out... stepping out into the wrestling business! God, i feel like im 78 again!



He begins dancing the cabbage patch as the scene fades out.