Post by Lurrr on Aug 28, 2019 11:52:33 GMT -6
~The scene opens with a pulled back view of what looks to be a main entrance to some kind of school. You see four large circular columns surrounded by lots of red brick. As the camera zooms in we see, in large lettering, Cinco Ranch High School established 1999. We suddenly see a navy blue F-150 four door Raptor truck pull up and park in the circle drive in front of the school where we see no parking signs clearly posted. The camera zooms in and we see the familiar license plate “WKUPCL” with this back end view of the truck. Suddenly two doors open and here we see Lurrr and Rick Mathis hop out of the truck. As both men close their doors we see what appears to be some type of school security guard pulling up on a pathetic looking bike. And no we don’t mean motorcycle, we mean a bicycle. The man has a bike helmet on, is wearing glasses, has a long grey beard, and looks miserable as hell~
Lurrr: God I remember these jack offs back in my high school days. They would monitor the fucking school grounds, make sure none of the underclassmen would sneak off campus for lunch, hand out parking tickets like candy, and tell you to turn down your loud music when you were in your car.
Rick Mathis: This guy looks like he should be inside with one of the special needs classes.
Lurrr: Yeah we called our nuisance Bicycle Bob during my days. This guy looks like an exact replica.
Rick Mathis: Well don’t piss him off until after your appearance. I set this up so you could make a little extra coin because that pathetic excuse for an owner, Mike Zybala, never paid out those last checks including our royalties when the OCW shut down a few weeks back so you need this money.
Lurrr: Yeah, yeah whatever…
~The man slowly gets off the bike. He turns around with his back to both Lurrr and Mathis. He bends down to get out his notepad and as he does, you can see a large sweat stain on his ass going all the way up his back. Lurrr makes a nauseating face as he sees this. He turns around to speak with the men~
Security Guard: Gentlemen, I noticed you have parked your truck in a no parking zone I am going to have to write you up.
Lurrr: First of all, I am just going to refer to you as Bicycle Bob for the short duration of this pointless conversation because that’s what I know you as from my high school days. I am here on official school business. I am being paid by your school district to appear today so go ahead and write me up you pathetic cocksucker!!
Bicycle Bob: Excuse me sir! You can’t speak to a school employee like that! I am going to write you up again for this!!
Rick Mathis: Come on Lurrr don’t fuck this up… we are going to need to make a good impression today. While it’s awesome that the GCWA has reopened and also that they contacted you to main event at the first Inferno against The Big Bifford, you need to remember they are strapped for cash and are operating like a small one right now. You aren’t being paid like a Main Eventer currently with their small budget. So if you don’t make a great impression today word is going to get around and I won’t be able to book these quick one time appearances!
~Lurrr looks at Mathis and rolls his eyes~
Lurrr: Yeah I know don’t worry about it. Hey Bicycle Bob come on over here let me take that ticket. I will pay for it in the office then come back out and move my truck.
Bicycle Bob: Ok good here you go…
~Bicycle Bob approaches Lurrr and as soon as he is within reaching distance Lurrr, predictably, hits him with the Wake Up Call. Mathis puts his hands over his head~
Rick Mathis: Oh shit Lurrr what the fuck!!!
Lurrr: I told you not to worry about it! It’s all going to be fine. Just grab him and throw him behind those bushes and I will grab his bike. We will be out of here with money in hand before he comes to.
~Mathis follows the order and both the man and his bike are thrown in the bushes out of sight. They both walk into the school and are met by the Vice Principal~
Vice Principal: Mr. Lurrr thank you so much for being here today. We have a classroom of our Senior Student leaders waiting for you. They are very excited for this Q & A session and look forward to all of your important life advice and guidance today.
~Rick Mathis seems to be nervously looking on as he knows Lurrr is probably not the best role model for these students. But he probably lied when negotiating the appearance letting the school know that what you see on TV is just an act and he is a very level headed person… whoops. Both men follow the Vice Principal down a hallway to the classroom~
Lurrr: Alright so after this little thing we need to pick up a case of beer for the road trip to Midland. Get to go back to where the “Summer of Lurrr” all began, the GCWA!!! You know I was the first call they made being a GCWA Hall of Famer, former GCWA World Champ, 2-time X-Division Champ, and Intercontinental Champ. And it was perfect timing with the OCW shutting down its doors right before I got my shot at that World Title. So I did what any other 2-time Hall of Famer and 4-time World Champ would do, demand a World Title shot.
Rick Mathis: Yeah but its bullshit they are making you go through three guys in three weeks.
Lurrr: Bring it on! The boss and his two kids can do all they want to try and make this a tougher spot for me but bottom-line is in the end when he gets his kids trained up on how this business works they will realize who the ratings come from and ratings increase bank accounts. Hell they already need to look no further than this Friday where the old man already put me in the Main Event against that fat ass Bifford. Not to mention the marketing strategy they know they can use as Friday night is the 10th Anniversary of when I destroyed Marcus Ka’Derrion to claim my first GCWA World Title at Heat Wave. How about that history lesson!
Rick Mathis: That was a great night indeed! As far as Bifford, you guys have crossed paths a ton in GCWA. X-Division Title matches, World Title Matches, the Ultimate Survival, Righteous Rumble, you name it.
Lurrr: Yeah he has been that annoying fly you can’t get to leave you alone that’s for sure. But it’s laughable that he tries to talk down my career. The fact of the matter is what I have done in my career is probably three Bifford careers combined. All you have to do is look at my record, my championships, my accolades, and of course the Hall of Fame status.
Rick Mathis: Yeah man there isn’t anybody in this business especially in the GCWA who can compete with your resume. And if they want to attack your age I think you have proven over the last 9 months in the OCW that you can still Main Event and carry a company. Hell that’s why you were the first person called for the GCWA re-opening and not Bifford.
~The walk down the hallway has stopped as the Vice Principal opens a classroom door. Both Lurrr and Mathis walk in and see a room set up in a U-shape with tables and chairs. We see 15 or so High School Seniors from Cinco Ranch sitting in these chairs. All of these students have just started school back up and the school staff always likes to bring in a special speaker to give them advice on their upcoming year with peer pressure, temptations, and college prep. Lurrr stands up in the middle of the room and the Vice Principal introduces him. The students clap and begin to raise their hands~
Lurrr: I just want to thank you guys for having me and I hope I can give you some great feedback! Yes, you first.
~A young lady named Melanie puts her hand down and begins with a question~
Melanie: Can you talk about how to handle peer pressure? Some of us know that Homecoming parties, after school football game parties, alcohol can sometimes be pressed onto you.
Lurrr: First of all, yes peer pressure can be tough, but I always just say roll with the punches, enjoy life, and let the good times roll! And don’t worry sweetheart you will get a chance to not only get your fill of alcohol but hopefully some drugs too!! And yes the Big Bifford is an overrated fat ass who can’t even see his dick in the morning when he has to take a piss. He wishes he was me, which is why he has such a hard on for getting in the ring with me.
Vice Principal: I think what our guest speaker is trying to say is it can be tough so just be careful with who you decide to choose as friends.
Lurrr: Uh yeah ok.. you have a question?
~Another student, this time a male student named Doug, begins to speak~
Doug: Ok so let’s say you are concerned about passing your Spanish class because you know the baseball season is around the corner and you need to pass a test to stay eligible. How do you handle those temptations to make sure your classmate sits next to you and clearly makes it easy for you to cheat?
Lurrr: Oh brother that was my go to in High School! Always ensure you are eligible for Athletics or your Senior year will suck because that means no lettermen’s jacket? Which then means no underclassmen girls right?? And yes it is rumored that Bifford has been hit over the head so many times causing retarded brain damage, that he doesn’t even know what title he is fighting for, the OCW Title or GCWA Title.
Vice Principal: Once again I think he is trying to remind everyone that keeping your eligibility for extracurricular activities is very important. Not quite sure why he keeps referencing this Bifford guy though.
Lurrr: Well yeah in a way but also that Bifford is a fucking retard and I am going to lay his fat ass out on Friday night. Anyways I think we have time for one more question, yeah you over there with a Texas A&M dri-fit shirt on. You know what’s up, what’s your name, Eric?
~The Vice Principal looks confused as Lurrr was supposed to be booked for an hour not 10 minutes~
Eric: Sir any guidance on the peer pressure of safe-sex and how to handle those tough situations with your significant others at a young age?
~The Vice Principal eyes widen scared of what is fixing to be stated and he tries to intervene but Lurrr stops him~
Lurrr: You are paying me good money to offer my guidance please don’t interrupt me. Now going back to the safe sex question… first of all Bifford’s parents should have definitely practiced that to avoid creating him… but short answer NO don’t it doesn’t feel…..
~The Vice Principal cuts Lurrr~
Vice Principal: Sir please….
~Suddenly his radio begins to go off and you can hear a voice stating that their security officer has been found laid out. Lurrr and Mathis look at each other and realize it is time to go~
Lurrr: Alright well thanks for the quick session! Mathis grab that envelope… it is cash right because we don’t need a stop payment on a check.
~Mathis nods as he grabs the envelope from the Vice Principal~
Lurrr: Awesome thanks! Just remember kids get laid, stay buzzed, and graduate, by any means necessary!!
~The scene ends as Lurrr and Mathis shove the Vice Principal out of the way, who is now trying to get someone on the radio to stop both men, which won’t happen. Lurrr is on his way to Midland, TX to begin his quest for a second GCWA World Title. It will be exactly 10 years on Friday from when he won his first GCWA Title and on the 10-year anniversary of that Heat Wave night Lurrr will continue to prove to the Big Bifford that he is a notch below his level when he starts off this round robin tournament with a successful Wake Up Call for the 1, 2, and 3. The scene fades to black~
Lurrr: God I remember these jack offs back in my high school days. They would monitor the fucking school grounds, make sure none of the underclassmen would sneak off campus for lunch, hand out parking tickets like candy, and tell you to turn down your loud music when you were in your car.
Rick Mathis: This guy looks like he should be inside with one of the special needs classes.
Lurrr: Yeah we called our nuisance Bicycle Bob during my days. This guy looks like an exact replica.
Rick Mathis: Well don’t piss him off until after your appearance. I set this up so you could make a little extra coin because that pathetic excuse for an owner, Mike Zybala, never paid out those last checks including our royalties when the OCW shut down a few weeks back so you need this money.
Lurrr: Yeah, yeah whatever…
~The man slowly gets off the bike. He turns around with his back to both Lurrr and Mathis. He bends down to get out his notepad and as he does, you can see a large sweat stain on his ass going all the way up his back. Lurrr makes a nauseating face as he sees this. He turns around to speak with the men~
Security Guard: Gentlemen, I noticed you have parked your truck in a no parking zone I am going to have to write you up.
Lurrr: First of all, I am just going to refer to you as Bicycle Bob for the short duration of this pointless conversation because that’s what I know you as from my high school days. I am here on official school business. I am being paid by your school district to appear today so go ahead and write me up you pathetic cocksucker!!
Bicycle Bob: Excuse me sir! You can’t speak to a school employee like that! I am going to write you up again for this!!
Rick Mathis: Come on Lurrr don’t fuck this up… we are going to need to make a good impression today. While it’s awesome that the GCWA has reopened and also that they contacted you to main event at the first Inferno against The Big Bifford, you need to remember they are strapped for cash and are operating like a small one right now. You aren’t being paid like a Main Eventer currently with their small budget. So if you don’t make a great impression today word is going to get around and I won’t be able to book these quick one time appearances!
~Lurrr looks at Mathis and rolls his eyes~
Lurrr: Yeah I know don’t worry about it. Hey Bicycle Bob come on over here let me take that ticket. I will pay for it in the office then come back out and move my truck.
Bicycle Bob: Ok good here you go…
~Bicycle Bob approaches Lurrr and as soon as he is within reaching distance Lurrr, predictably, hits him with the Wake Up Call. Mathis puts his hands over his head~
Rick Mathis: Oh shit Lurrr what the fuck!!!
Lurrr: I told you not to worry about it! It’s all going to be fine. Just grab him and throw him behind those bushes and I will grab his bike. We will be out of here with money in hand before he comes to.
~Mathis follows the order and both the man and his bike are thrown in the bushes out of sight. They both walk into the school and are met by the Vice Principal~
Vice Principal: Mr. Lurrr thank you so much for being here today. We have a classroom of our Senior Student leaders waiting for you. They are very excited for this Q & A session and look forward to all of your important life advice and guidance today.
~Rick Mathis seems to be nervously looking on as he knows Lurrr is probably not the best role model for these students. But he probably lied when negotiating the appearance letting the school know that what you see on TV is just an act and he is a very level headed person… whoops. Both men follow the Vice Principal down a hallway to the classroom~
Lurrr: Alright so after this little thing we need to pick up a case of beer for the road trip to Midland. Get to go back to where the “Summer of Lurrr” all began, the GCWA!!! You know I was the first call they made being a GCWA Hall of Famer, former GCWA World Champ, 2-time X-Division Champ, and Intercontinental Champ. And it was perfect timing with the OCW shutting down its doors right before I got my shot at that World Title. So I did what any other 2-time Hall of Famer and 4-time World Champ would do, demand a World Title shot.
Rick Mathis: Yeah but its bullshit they are making you go through three guys in three weeks.
Lurrr: Bring it on! The boss and his two kids can do all they want to try and make this a tougher spot for me but bottom-line is in the end when he gets his kids trained up on how this business works they will realize who the ratings come from and ratings increase bank accounts. Hell they already need to look no further than this Friday where the old man already put me in the Main Event against that fat ass Bifford. Not to mention the marketing strategy they know they can use as Friday night is the 10th Anniversary of when I destroyed Marcus Ka’Derrion to claim my first GCWA World Title at Heat Wave. How about that history lesson!
Rick Mathis: That was a great night indeed! As far as Bifford, you guys have crossed paths a ton in GCWA. X-Division Title matches, World Title Matches, the Ultimate Survival, Righteous Rumble, you name it.
Lurrr: Yeah he has been that annoying fly you can’t get to leave you alone that’s for sure. But it’s laughable that he tries to talk down my career. The fact of the matter is what I have done in my career is probably three Bifford careers combined. All you have to do is look at my record, my championships, my accolades, and of course the Hall of Fame status.
Rick Mathis: Yeah man there isn’t anybody in this business especially in the GCWA who can compete with your resume. And if they want to attack your age I think you have proven over the last 9 months in the OCW that you can still Main Event and carry a company. Hell that’s why you were the first person called for the GCWA re-opening and not Bifford.
~The walk down the hallway has stopped as the Vice Principal opens a classroom door. Both Lurrr and Mathis walk in and see a room set up in a U-shape with tables and chairs. We see 15 or so High School Seniors from Cinco Ranch sitting in these chairs. All of these students have just started school back up and the school staff always likes to bring in a special speaker to give them advice on their upcoming year with peer pressure, temptations, and college prep. Lurrr stands up in the middle of the room and the Vice Principal introduces him. The students clap and begin to raise their hands~
Lurrr: I just want to thank you guys for having me and I hope I can give you some great feedback! Yes, you first.
~A young lady named Melanie puts her hand down and begins with a question~
Melanie: Can you talk about how to handle peer pressure? Some of us know that Homecoming parties, after school football game parties, alcohol can sometimes be pressed onto you.
Lurrr: First of all, yes peer pressure can be tough, but I always just say roll with the punches, enjoy life, and let the good times roll! And don’t worry sweetheart you will get a chance to not only get your fill of alcohol but hopefully some drugs too!! And yes the Big Bifford is an overrated fat ass who can’t even see his dick in the morning when he has to take a piss. He wishes he was me, which is why he has such a hard on for getting in the ring with me.
Vice Principal: I think what our guest speaker is trying to say is it can be tough so just be careful with who you decide to choose as friends.
Lurrr: Uh yeah ok.. you have a question?
~Another student, this time a male student named Doug, begins to speak~
Doug: Ok so let’s say you are concerned about passing your Spanish class because you know the baseball season is around the corner and you need to pass a test to stay eligible. How do you handle those temptations to make sure your classmate sits next to you and clearly makes it easy for you to cheat?
Lurrr: Oh brother that was my go to in High School! Always ensure you are eligible for Athletics or your Senior year will suck because that means no lettermen’s jacket? Which then means no underclassmen girls right?? And yes it is rumored that Bifford has been hit over the head so many times causing retarded brain damage, that he doesn’t even know what title he is fighting for, the OCW Title or GCWA Title.
Vice Principal: Once again I think he is trying to remind everyone that keeping your eligibility for extracurricular activities is very important. Not quite sure why he keeps referencing this Bifford guy though.
Lurrr: Well yeah in a way but also that Bifford is a fucking retard and I am going to lay his fat ass out on Friday night. Anyways I think we have time for one more question, yeah you over there with a Texas A&M dri-fit shirt on. You know what’s up, what’s your name, Eric?
~The Vice Principal looks confused as Lurrr was supposed to be booked for an hour not 10 minutes~
Eric: Sir any guidance on the peer pressure of safe-sex and how to handle those tough situations with your significant others at a young age?
~The Vice Principal eyes widen scared of what is fixing to be stated and he tries to intervene but Lurrr stops him~
Lurrr: You are paying me good money to offer my guidance please don’t interrupt me. Now going back to the safe sex question… first of all Bifford’s parents should have definitely practiced that to avoid creating him… but short answer NO don’t it doesn’t feel…..
~The Vice Principal cuts Lurrr~
Vice Principal: Sir please….
~Suddenly his radio begins to go off and you can hear a voice stating that their security officer has been found laid out. Lurrr and Mathis look at each other and realize it is time to go~
Lurrr: Alright well thanks for the quick session! Mathis grab that envelope… it is cash right because we don’t need a stop payment on a check.
~Mathis nods as he grabs the envelope from the Vice Principal~
Lurrr: Awesome thanks! Just remember kids get laid, stay buzzed, and graduate, by any means necessary!!
~The scene ends as Lurrr and Mathis shove the Vice Principal out of the way, who is now trying to get someone on the radio to stop both men, which won’t happen. Lurrr is on his way to Midland, TX to begin his quest for a second GCWA World Title. It will be exactly 10 years on Friday from when he won his first GCWA Title and on the 10-year anniversary of that Heat Wave night Lurrr will continue to prove to the Big Bifford that he is a notch below his level when he starts off this round robin tournament with a successful Wake Up Call for the 1, 2, and 3. The scene fades to black~